Tension

I try to unplug from my story,
But I find the dark
And I hear Lori.

I let you touch me,
And I feel my pain.
I’m tight and guarded;
Prepared for rain.

And so i breath;
Perspective open.
I try to leave the guilt,
Like token
That i picked up
Along the way
And held.
It’s in me now;

A part of me
That i can’t let go of.

So here i am,
Figuring out how to give
Of myself;
To be fully present,
While holding the past,
And while framing the future
That i see as right,

As others have expectations of me;
Different from how i see myself,
Being.

I can’t help but feed in;
Reacting in the moment
With resistance,
As i reassure myself that i am right.

Tough,
Managing self
And finding peace;
Allowing life to be as it is.

Much work to do.
I try my best to enjoy the journey,
While wondering what I’ve learned,
And where i should be headed.
Seems a deeper part of me knows
And is in control.

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